“Before the Throne of God Above” is my absolute favorite hymn. It is so comforting. It reminds me that I don’t have to be good enough – and that’s a good thing, because I’m definitely not. With my uncountable sins and sinful habits, I often feel like I’ll never be good enough. This song helps me realize that I am forgiven. Jesus Christ has saved me with His blood – and He’s forgiven me for all my sins – sins that I’ve already committed and will commit. Unintentional or intentional, it doesn’t matter. I’m forgiven!!
I especially love the verse in this song that says, “When Satan tempts me to despair, and tells me of the guilt within, upward I look and see Him there – Who made an end to all my sin.” I am constantly reminded of my sins on a daily basis – my inflexibility, stubbornness, selfishness, rudeness, grudges, and more…and Satan tempts me to despair. At those times, I feel like I’ll never be good enough. At those times, I can’t imagine any man getting to know who I really am, and love me enough to ask me to marry him. I feel like such a terrible daughter, and I can’t stand it. I still struggle with that, because I feel like those sins are so prevalent.
Now, though, I think I’m beginning to understand. I will never be good enough – but that’s the beauty of it. If we were good enough, there wouldn’t be a need for God’s saving grace. It’s still frustrating that I have these sinful habits, but the more I draw on the strength of God’s Word, and rely on Him to continually soften my heart, I believe that those habits will become easier to conquer, and will slowly fade. I want to change; I need to change, and I can’t do it on my own. But with Christ Jesus, all things are possible. I’m depending on it.
Upward I look and see Him there – Who made an end to all my sin!